Thursday, 17 September 2015


Home Bargains House, Southampton

It's not all doom and gloom! Here's one of the new breed of budget supermarket sponsored apartment blocks currently being thrown up in the disenfranchised sinkholes of the UK. Residents are entitled to 5% discount at any sponsoring store, as long as they do not buy alcohol or food. Other terms and conditions will definitely apply.

The plan was to have architects, psychologists and sociologists design the buildings using the pin wheel chart above to ensure that the most important requirements for health and happiness were all included. Unfortunately, the numbers add up to 1027%, which makes no sense whatsoever, so the flats have instead been built to the most basic of specifications and, as such, just about provide partial cover from the elements and a chute to shit down. Post-Crisis, they will be the most sought after properties on the market, so start hoarding barter goods now. 

In actual right now paper money, a one bedroom flat will cost you £275,000. Please don't humiliate yourself by asking about London prices.

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